Sunshine & Rain

As we find ourselves at the last few days of PJ's Tier 1 Unemployment our emotions are obviously on an all time high. We are scrambling, hoping, praying, thinking, over thinking and praying some more. We have all sorts of scenarios running around in our heads for the best, worst and in between. We will find out this week  (Wednesday or Thursday I believe) if PJ qualifies for Tier 2 unemployment, how long that lasts and if the amount stays the same. 


The last interview PJ was on has left a lot of questions for not only for ourselves and each other, but for God.


It went something like this: He met a gal he went to school with in the lobby, she explained that they were hiring on the spot (she just got hired) and she will see him at orientation! He gets in to see this woman, has the interview, and when she gets to the part about him being on probation for 90 days and does he foresee any time off....this is where it gets dicey. He explains that I am pregnant (and when I am due) and that he would need at least the day I have Sophie off but preferably 2-3 days. Explaining that he's hoping that this is enough in advance to let them know. She immediately says that it's just not possible and if they have a position that fits his needs she will call him. 


What is it we are supposed to do? We have talked about starting our own business, but doing what? He went back to school and got is CNA but can't get a job. He did grounds and janitorial for 5+ years but can't get a job. 


With the way we prayed before his last interview (above) and the way it went, is God saying he needs to stay home right now? We haven't stopped applying at jobs but he just isn't getting the calls. Obviously the right thing hasn't come along yet because he would have a job if it did. I guess I am trying to figure out God's plan, which I know I should just let it unfold but the uncertainty gets to me sometimes. 


I read in a blog today something that hit my heart and soul. It felt as though it was aimed directly at me. Because sometimes even though we pray for sunshine, God knows that what we really need in order to grow is rain.  


As we struggle to find our footing, we are continually learning to trust that God has it all planned out. That saying, "If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans" is exactly what we keep trying to do! It's hard. But we are determined to have God light our way for our family, our financial situation and our life overall.